


Blossomfall

by Jyunsung



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Character Death, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Light Angst, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Tags Contain Spoilers, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-25 12:15:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17121185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jyunsung/pseuds/Jyunsung
Summary: Yasuo finds something wrong with Riven and is determined to get to the bottom of it, but what he finds in the dark abyss of her strange behaviors leave him torn.





	1. Flowers Bloom

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chariset](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chariset/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Flight](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13741449) by [chariset](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chariset/pseuds/chariset). 



> At first I thought I'd write a little something, something angsty just to cure my boredom but it somehow became this. Enjoy while I work on the next, the next also being the last as this is a 2 chapter short story.

Their swords clash. 

Hers, a blade of the strongest stone, with ancient Runes inscribed, glowing a bright, mysterious green. Strong and steady, but heavy and slow. 

His, a nimble strip of sharp metal, moving like lightning through the air. As swift as wind, as quick as death. Deft and deadly, but lacking in pure undefined strength. 

Yasuo's sword gives, but he swiftly ducks to avoid Riven's blow. Dashing to the right, he sweeps his arm low, cutting blades of grass with a swift motion. He calls to the wind and sends the blades of grass towards Riven's eyes. But her sword is already there, already at the ready, already blocking his attack. Her blade restricts as much movement as him, but there's no doubt his sword breaks easier. As if he'll let that happen. 

As Riven drops her sword from eye level, he sees him rushing at her. He's already off the ground, his own blade at his hip as he lunges, swinging his arm in an arc. She leaps back, but not fast enough. The hem of her dress is cut cleanly across, and before she can even brace her foot for the impact of her backwards leap, Yasuo attacks again with an arc to blow a sudden gust of wind into her abdomen. 

Her back hits the stone pillar of the temple. She grunts in pain, her grip on her sword giving slightly, something Yasuo sees. He smirks and advances on her, tip of his blade pointing straight at her chest; her heart. But he knows better than to let his guard down. He knows that Riven won't just give up that easily. She's not that soft, and she may bend, but never break. But what she does next shocked him. 

Yasuo can only watch in horror and confusion as Riven's fingers unfurled and let the sword's hilt slip from her grasp. The sword fell to the marbled floor with an echoing thud, as Riven sighed and closed her eyes. 

"You win." She whispers. She bats Yasuo's blade away and pushes herself up, reaching down to pick up her sword, then leaving the arena without saying goodbye. 

His mind races with what just happened. Riven's known for her unbending, iron will. He's confident to say that she's never lost a battle, or surrendered. Some call her stubborn, or unvaluing of life, but Yasuo calls her determined. Having any association with her at all means it's either her way or the highway. He can't help but feel a little... Disappointed. 

But he dismisses it as simply Riven having a bad day. 

 

☜☆☞

 

The forest is calming. 

Emerald green of the various plants all around them, a thriving community within themselves. Long strands of leaves fluttering in the wind, sweet birdsong in the air. 

The calls of forest critters, the shade provided by the arms of the old trees. The musical silence all around them is deafening, yet calming at the same time. 

Yasuo chews on his food as he studies Riven. They're taking a break from sparring in the woods to have lunch. Though each brought their own food so it's probably certain she at least brought something she likes, she's picking and prodding at the food, disinterested almost, not eating it at all or making any moves to do so at all. 

He studies her. She seems a little tired, maybe today's training wore her down a little more. Strange. They only did a few excercises. He notes the way she slides the tip of her finger across the edge of the paper bag, pauses and does it again. He notes the way she's slumped against the tree bark, shoulders sloping down like she's got the weight of the whole world on her shoulders. 

"Riven." A simple call of her name snaps her attention to him quicker than he can blink. He startles, not expecting her to react so quickly, because she usually ignores him when he calls her name. 

"Yes?" She answers, voice almost timid as her hazel eyes drop again. He sighs and presses two fingers to the bridge of his nose. She's still playing with the poor opening of the paper bag, and now she's clutching it in a death hold causing the surface to become so crumpled, he's sure it's on the edge of tearing. 

"Riven." He starts, and she turns her eyes on him instantly, as he expected. "Why aren't you eating?"He swears her face almost falls still that question, but quick as it came the expression is gone, replaced by a smile. 

"Oh. I'm not hungry." came her response, a little too curtly. 

Yasuo narrows his eyes, a tad bit suspicious of Riven's actions lately. She stares blankly back, her smile not quite reaching her eyes. Concern can't help but pool in his stomach, just a little bit. But maybe she really isn't hungry, he tells himself. Or maybe her tastes have changed, or maybe someone else prepared her lunch. He tells himself he's not her best friend, after all, and can't expect to predict everything she does. She's bound to have some surprise to her. 

But he can't help but be a little put off. 

 

☜☆☞

 

The night sky is beautiful. 

The stars glitter among the dark, each's own unique glow burning a hole in the black of the sky. The great expanse above is their stage, and they are the performers. 

Misty translucent clouds swirl among the stars, their presence ghosting the sparkles of the night briefly. A silver of the lightest fog, a tear from the veils of brides. 

It's perfect for sightseeing. It's rare that the sky is clear as it is tonight, so some people from the sparring academy decided to have a camp out to watch the sky. Naturally, Yasuo, seeking for a break, accepted. Will she? 

He knocks softly at Riven's dormitory door, the slight sounds echoing with the emptiness of the place now that most people are out viewing the skies. No response. He knocks again, this time more insistent. 

"Come in." comes the tired sounding whisper. He pushes the door open, entering and closing it gently behind him. He looks around. Nothing much has changed since last he visited though he notes the place is more messy. The unsettling feeling comes again. Riven's slumped on the couch, hair down, head in her left hand as she peers at him. He takes the silence as a cue to move closer. Upon doing so he notices the bags under her eyes, and the way her skin is just a shade less vibrant than usual. The way she looks up at him like she's fed up with everything in the world just fuels the feeling in his gut.

"Riven." She doesn't snap her head to him. Instead only get eyes move, and is it him but does her eyes just feel a little more sad, more solemn, more... serious... He can't pick a word but the air feels heavy all of a sudden. 

"We were thinking of heading out to see the night sky. It's quite pretty tonight, and I didn't see your name on the list so I thought you might have missed the memo. Hence why I am here, to inform you." As he speaks, there's no way he could miss the drooping of Riven's eyes. It's a slight action, but coupled with her sallow skin and sallow eyebags, he feels there's more than a little wrong. No. He knows; he knows there's something wrong. Riven never misses her sleep, and takes borderline exquisite care of herself so there's no reason as to why she's been behaving so tired lately, except that something's been keeping her up. This, coupled with what happened during their 'forest lunch', as well as some other bits in between, sets off a few alarm bells in his head. 

Before he can think further, Riven shakes her head and sighs, batting her hand in annoyance. "I got the memo. But I'm too tired to go, no matter how pretty the night is. Sorry." He makes a move. 

"Riven, listen," He walks forward and grips her shoulders roughly, earning a gasp and glare from her - and is it him but her shoulders feel bonier, sharper, than usual - before he stares with an uncharacteristic concern in his eyes and voice. "These few weeks. There's something that not right with you. And I know it's not my place to force you or scold you, or make you do anything, but as a friend you have to know I am concerned. Very. So please, Riven," He emphasizes her name and isn't suprised to see a twitch from her. "Tell me what's wrong so I can help. Please, I'll do anything for you."

But she laughs. She laughs and that only serves to stir Yasuo's gut in a way he does not and will never like. Her laugh sounds scratchy, but suprisingly real, unlike everything about her lately. He stands and just watches her as tears of joy escape her eyes. She wipes them away with her palm, but more come and before he realizes it, she's full on crying. And not the good, humored kind like before. These are tears of sorrow. He can't help but be at least a little entranced by the way her tears sparkle but he quickly snaps out of it, credits to Riven's ragged breaths and broken sobs. She stares up at him through her tears, face blank except for a fleeting expression of helplessness across her eyes that Yasuo barely catches. 

"Oh, Yasuo, oh my god. Are you really that stupid?" She lets out a choked laugh. "I love you, Yasuo, I fucking love you but you can't tell and it hurts so, so, SO bad but I can't do anything about it. No one can do anything about it, not even you." 

"You wanna know why? Because even if you love me, I'll never have enough. I'm a greedy person. A greedy, horrible, attention eating whore. I'll always want more, and more, and I'll never be satisfied because that's just the monster I am," Riven's eyes widen in a desperate manner as a smile tugs on her thin lips. She clasps her hands together and to her chest, pushing them so inward it must hurt. "Yasuo, reject me so I can stop pining after you, so I can move on. Because my heart will never be still knowing that you might love me in return. Then I start thinking about our future, our children, our everything and that drives me fucking crazy, fucking insane because I'm like that and I can't help it!" Riven gasps for air, her eyes locking dead onto him, her fingers grasping at the front of her shirt, probably an attempt to keep her hands from clawing at Yasuo. Her breathing goes ragged; fast, then slow; breaking then smoothing. 

"So please, Yasuo. Please. Say no." 

And he does the unthinkable. Something he knows he'll regret but he does. 

He says no. 

The feeling in his gut nearly burns him, scorching, guilty flames that lick at his heart and mind and body, his everything. 

Riven chokes out a pained cry, then a wild howl, a ragged roar of anger and devastation. Her fingernails detach from her front and claw at the couch's armrests, her nails tearing the leather to reveal curls of white stuffing. She drops her head and howls again, a haunting echo of grief. Thenshe raises her tear-stained, anguished face and sends a smile towards him, a smile that lurches his heart in a wrong way, derails his consciousness. With her eerie smile stuck floating in his mind, he barely notices himself walking, then running wildly to join the night-sky-seeing group; and the next thing he knows, he's drunk and puking all over the grass and picnic mat, in the middle of the forest, whatever gods above - he doesn't even care at this point - probably mocking him. 

Yet, Riven's haunting smile echoes in his mind. 

 

☜☆☞

 

The hangover is heavy like he expects. His head hurts, his eyes hurt, his nose hurts, everything hurts. It's just a haze of pain and more pain and even more rain but eventually he pushes past that and actually gets ready for the day. He's got a training session today, he reminds himself, with... Riven. 

Ah. The mere mention of her name causes him to stiffen and the feeling in his gut to return, tenfold heavier than yesterday. He remembers her tears, her cries, her words. He remembers the absolute devastation, yet strange artificial calmness in her eyes, her eyes that tell thousands of stories just from a fleeting gaze. Her words, oh her words. They break him, wring apart everything that made him up. Her crystalline tears, glittering in the light of her truth. He recalls her confession. The unruly desperation for an end to all of this in her eyes. His breathing hitches and quickens instantly, his stomach nearly dropping, as if hit by the aftermath of drugs from the devil himself. Chills run down his body as her smile flashes before his eyes, chills that tell him something is going to happen; something bad. Chills that sends him pulling on his clothes and racing out the door faster than the wind, the light. 

As he nears the door of the sparring arena, the aftermath of his worry-based euphoria springs in, leaving him panting and seeing black as the corners of his eyes. But he doesn't care, something is much more important. He practically kicks the door open despite his tiredness, the wood of the door slamming into the wall of the arena and nearly hitting Yasuo in the face had he been where he was just now. He does a quick scan and doesn't see Riven, feeling his conscience grow hands and claw at his throat. He dashes to the instructor, the instructor jumping as Yasuo's boots scrape on the floor. 

"Ah, Yasuo, you're a - "

"WHERE IS RIVEN?!" He nearly falls over in impatience. 

"Oh, she said she's not going to practice with us anymore......."

The instructor speaks a whole load more but Yasuo hears none of it. His limbs have gone numb, so has his common reasoning. The air all of a sudden gets very pressuring, as he finds it extremely hard to breathe, like some godly existence is pressuring on his chest and his throat. Black springs from the corners and edges of his vision, clawing and trying to take over. He suddenly feels weak, too weak as he grabs wildly onto thin air for something to hold onto, fingers meeting emptiness. Black springs from the corners and edges of his vision, clawing and trying to take over. He suddenly feels weak, too weak as he grabs wildly onto thin air for something to hold onto, fingers meeting emptiness. Duty overwhelms his fatigue and shock. He recovers, not even yelling goodbye as he barges out the door again.

She can't go so soon. That's what he tells himself, though as he races for Riven's room, tearing through everyone he meets on the way, he knows he's wrong.


	2. And Flowers Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How to solve Writer's Block: grab yourself some Starbucks, sit and nap, get up and get more Starbucks. Rinse and repeat till you feel guilty enough to start writing. 
> 
> Enjoy the product of my Starbucks high.

Yasuo reaches Riven's door, panting and out of breath. He touches a finger to her door, but instantly draws back like it burnt him.  
He's supposed to be strong, right? Why is he so weak all of a sudden? Why is he so scared of a simple door. Not the door, he tells himself, but what is on the other side of that door. Tenatively pressing his fingertips against the wood, he frowns and pushes at it using his palm, with all his might he has at the moment. As prepared as he made himself, he can't help but feel vomit rising in his throat as he sees it for the first, and hopefully last time. 

Riven's dead body. 

She's still. Stiller than a live person; but of course, she's not alive after all. Her head is bowed, her fringe thankfully shielding Yasuo's eyes from her expression. He didn't want to know the probable desperation in her eyes, the raw hunger and lust in her expression, the sad, all knowing smile on her lips. He did not and will never want to see that on a face like hers. His eyes trail down, locking in on the scratch marks by her upper arms. No doubt from the night before, the blood is already caked and dried. It long turned brown, flaking off in small pieces, though the wounds are still huge and open, showing off the pink and white flesh laying underneath. A small trickle of blood runs down, and he tears his eyes away forcefully. He notes the way Riven's muscles have receeded. He can't blame her. She's been off her game for the past few weeks.... And he'd only noticed a few days ago. 

Guilt bites into him, anchoring its fangs deeply into his core and deciding not to let go. It injects venom, in the form of regret. It's lethal and he bets he'll remember this for lifetimes to come. Suddenly the air feels cold. It feels biting, clawing, scratching at his surface, determined to weasel its way into him, to break him all over again. He feels a disgusting urge to reach out to Riven's body. To touch her frosty skin, to run his fingers through her hair, to put her weathered hand into his own. To caress her gaping wounds. To press his lips onto her own, stick his tongue into her freezing mouth, forcing her lips apart. To tear her clothes off, to touch her and caress her in ways that shouldn't even come into his mind. To push himself into her very core, cold and dark and unknown to everyone, to force her in ways he couldn't do before. To hear her make such sensual nosies, such beautiful 'music' from her cold lips. He doesn't know why he's having these thought, these feelings. Perhaps it's because of the weight of her death. Maybe her death will drive him crazy, maybe it's already driving him crazy, he can't tell, everything is hazy and he doesn't feel like he has control of anything and every little thought and presence around him and in his head just serve to drive him closer to the edge. He claws at his hair, stopping down low and dropping his head. He tries desperately, so, so desperately to make these thoughts get out of his head. But he can't help it. The root which drives beings insane has firmly planted itself into him and he can't get it out. 

Yasuo thought he'd prepared for this. He can't tell what he's feeling, what's right, what's wrong. Nothing's black and white, everything fuzzy and gray and blurry and confusing the hell out of him to the point he can't form cohesive words or strings of sane thoughts without nearly clawing his eyes out. He didn't feel this way when he watched the bodies of his victims drop limply around him like puppets with their strings sliced, or when he fiercely stabbed through Yone's abdomen, watching blood spurt and splatter on the wall. Like art, now that he thinks of it, the red liquid arching and dipping on the plain walls like painy, adding a splash of fresh color. But if Riven's death can awaken something in him that even his own brother Yone, his own damn flesh and blood, his fucking role model for the longest time he can recall, can't rouse, then she really must have something. Something he can't describe, something he can't and probably never will figure out. 

What he does know is that this particular feeling and everything related to this feeling is because of the wrong answer he gave that night. The wrong answer that could have changed everything. Every. Fucking. Thing. Yet he was too stupid, too dense, too blind to sense the hints Riven hurled at him, to take the other end of the lifeline she gave to him because she fucking trusted him to save her but he couldn't and will never again. And now? Now he's paying the price. The price that he'll never finish paying, even if he takes a loan of a million lives, a billion worlds, a trillion universes. 

 

☜☆☞

 

As Yasuo steps up to the stool, his ponytail nearly doesn't fit in the rope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you know what the ending implies.


End file.
